Vote or die

It's been a while since I've regaled you with stuff that doesn't matter, so here's some accumulated stuff that doesn't matter in no particular order of unimportance:

I just can't freaking wait for this American election to be over already and even though my exposure has been very limited, it's still been painful and I feel exactly like this kid:



It feels as though they have been campaigning for two solid years which leads me to wonder how the President has time to, I don't know....run the country? Do his damn job?

I am hoping that Mitt Romney becomes the next President only because I would love the level of devastation and outrage it would cause an arrogant narcissistic pretentious loud mouthed asshole Democrat I know on Facebook.

I am at the extreme other end of the spectrum of everything the Republican party stands for, and yet I hope for their election just to spite a jerkwad.

I went out to hear some live jazz last night and I ended up talking to a geologist from Scotland about earthquakes and then we had an earthquake last night. Spooky!

Also, some women behind me, for the life of them, could not shut the fuck up and why do people make a point of going to a live jazz club and then proceed to not shut the fuck up in a very loud manner, the entire night?

Also, a middle aged couple at a table in front of me were acting like some species of unusual teenaged birds who put on an elaborate and over the top show called LOOK AT ME!! in hopes of impressing a potential partner to the extent that copulation follows, thereby ensuring another generation of douche bags. Hey! Middle aged couple! Go do that in a non-live jazz club!

I am most likely going to start yelling at kids to get off my lawn any day now. I have become that person.

I have been watching entirely too many shows about the Mayan calendar ending on December 21st this year and the world ending with it, and let's just say that I don't think I should bother buying Christmas presents this year and I really really would like to be with my son on December 21st. Yes folks, I'm almost convinced that the sky is falling. I have become that person.

My son has jumped into the pool that is Taiwanese transportation and now drives a scooter around the city and he told me that every time he fires that thing up, he feels as though the entire ride is a continuous bungee jump off a bridge over rocks with a sketchy cord and that his death is imminent. He said he'd like to video tape a trip to show me the heart stopping and dangerous maneuvers he's got to perform (and would never ever think of performing here) to avoid becoming roadkill and then he said, no, he wouldn't do that because I'd have a heart attack and/or never sleep again.

I can't tell you how calm and serene I feel every day knowing that this could be the day that the bungee cord snaps and best case scenario is that he never walks again. My mind wanders to very messed up details such as would I fly out to Taiwan to bring his body home, or would I be capable of waiting for the plane to land here. I wonder about what sort of coffin would they place him in and do they fly dead bodies on commercial flights? I think about how I know I would not be capable of living without him.

On the bright side, I got to see some very respectable live jazz last night.